the poet
Pantheist Deborah Gaudin lives on the inspirational Welsh Marches. A member of the Border Poets for 20 years, she's contributed to several of the collective's anthologies. You'll find her work in the Abergavenny Small Press, Obsessed with Pipework and The Journal. She's also been featured twice in editions from Green Ink Poetry. Commended in the 2023 Yaffle Poetry Prize, Deborah's had poems in two Renard Press anthologies: Kinship and Interwoven. She's currently at work on her fourth collection, Wyrd Sisters, and writing poetry about the Onny Valley.
the poems
How Fortunate I Am
that today …
rain is coating slopes of trees with a thin slick.
Watching it descend over the hill
I think of those parched, pitted countries
where rain rarely falls, how they need it,
now, to quench fires ignited by hate
nourish a people in despair
the murderous swell of seas it has travelled
sucked up, to fall as a blessing here.
It pulls a blind over high heather covered
moors, sealing in moisture,
promising life; mist columns rise
ghosts of bitten, bomb-blasted towers
that will never take the shape of rooms again
rustle of leaves in a gentle wind
is the movement of falling plaster, a trickle of pain
which seems too small a word for loss, grief,
death
The wind rises, lamenting fields,
clouds of sheep scudding in front of it,
the only violence here, a squabble of starlings
their sudden panicked flight.
As the rain rolls in, long-left sea surges
collect unwanted in puddles, ruts
tyre treads of tractors, far away from
war, it’s scrabble and fight.
Make of me a crazed, cracked pot,
shedding water over devastated earth,
fissured parchment skin,
leaking love, comfort, to children who
need so much more than a hug, though
that would be a start, arc rainbows
over ruined lives, their haunted cries
an unanswered call to prayer.
Queenie
(Leda of Sparta)
It was one day, back end of summer,
and so lovely by the river.
Ducks pootling about, the scut of moorhens.
Mild it was, and this part so secluded,
I thought I’d strip off
and go for a nice refreshing swim.
When, without warning, this swan,
a big cob he was, landed
right in front of me, startling the air.
He came right up the bank,
beating his garment
of wings with light shining through.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I love nature,
but he was getting close,
so I began to back away, slowly.
I didn’t startle him, no such luck.
He took my chin in his beak
to pull me close, wings gentle now,
then came a soft enfolding. It was over quick,
a rearing up and a long
neck reaching up my back, a hiss.
Now, I’m a modern girl, but not
into zoophilia, that would
really let the fox among the geese!
I didn’t dare tell my husband, but later
I laid two perfect eggs
and all hell broke out of their shells.
Parents can’t be held responsible
for their offspring,
we just give them a chance at life.
Beauty is a sharp weapon to wield,
but the twins were always
good boys, quite divine in fact.
His Shoes
He saw the abandoned shoe
and stepped backward, a boy again,
walking in his borrowed shoes.
Felt the indentation of his brothers
heel, the angry stamp of the toddler
he never outgrew.
He saw the shoe
and took a step back on the pavement
though under foot he smelt wet grass,
crushed its stalks and the roll
of small stones contoured him back
to a wet meadow.
He saw the shoe
and stepped back to boot the ball,
sending his shoe flying in a perfect
arc against the blue,
in a time when all goals seemed
to be obtainable.
He saw the shoe
and stepped back to remember
under a scarred desk, their placed
companionship, his spit
and polish giving them a soft
school shine.
He saw his bare feet
when it was his brother’s turn,
shuffled in copper beech shade,
shod in dapple and last year’s fallen.
Then he was kingly in the wonder of his
elfin shoes.
He saw the shoe,
and all the steps of the footprints
that had walked him here, this blue
hazed morning, where the abandoned shoe
waited for him to place the other shoe
beside it.
Publishing credits
How Fortunate I Am: Interwoven (Renard Press)
Queenie: exclusive first publication by iamb
His Shoes: Kinship (Renard Press)
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